Yesterday I stopped off at Calling All Dogs to pick up a couple of chew toys and bones for Jack.  He’s pretty much chewed the shit out of his stuffed bird and doesn’t seem to care for the bones we got him, so I thought I’d try some new stuff.  This is the same place that we take Jack for his obedience school, so I really think they know what they’re talking about.  One of our trainers came over when I was shopping and asked if I’d ever given Jack a bully stick.  I haven’t.  They were in the jars on the tables with all the other bones, so I assumed, naturally, that they were also bones. The lady was like, “If you care about the smell, you can get one of the non-odor ones.”  I assumed (lots of assuming going on) that they would just smell like bones and I don’t really mind that smell, so I was like, “No, I don’t care about the smell.” Plus, I didn’t take the time to sniff it before I put it in the bag.

Today I thought I’d give it to Jack.  So, I pulled it out of the bag and realized the smell was kind of god awful.  Still though, I thought if he likes it, it’s OK.  After he’s nibbled on it for awhile, I’ll put it away.  I’m a curious one, so while he was chewing on it I googled, “bully sticks.”  Everything was positive and said how good they are for the dog, all natural, last a long time.  And then I saw what they actually are. Holy shit, I was not prepared for this!  Are you ready?  They are, in fact, not bones. Nope. They are…. BULL PENISES!  OH MY GOD!  Why is my cute, sweet, innocent dog chewing and licking a bull penis?  Can someone please explain to me why this has happened?  The worst part is that every time I smell it, I think of a bull penis. And when I went to put it away… Yep, bull penis.

I really don’t even want to know how these “sticks” came to be.  If they are indeed good for him, I will let him do what he wishes with the stick.  I’m disturbed though. Very, very disturbed.